Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Mondayness on Tuesday

No such luck in being allowed to sleep last night. At best I got a few hours of light REM sleep bookended with a few hours of wide awake time, replete with the outside noises as well as a new escalated round of ticks, pops, clicks, ker-chunks and others inside this apartment. It was worse than having the earmuffs on as they decided to time these seeming disparate sounds together, like music, one note (noise type) immediately following another in a regular pattern, every second or so. Another never-before noise escalation, on top of one earlier yesterday that also was part of the nightime show while in bed. Then to top it all off, after a barrage of preceding heavy equipment noise, they got me up at 0450h. I haven't had this kind of disruption for a while, perhaps six months or more, but the nature of these Monday night near sleeplessness seems to be to keep whatever Monday harassment gains continuing into Tuesday. That is the best explanation I can provide, as there has been a preponderance of these types of imposed wakefulness on Mondays, not to mention other harassment games. And in keeping with yesterday's fuckery they had me rage-ified over various serial provocations; a towel sticking to my foot, sharp fake touches, pulling items from my grasp, vision fucking so I couldn't detect the label on my shirt so it "ended up" on backwards, flicking crumbs around at breakfast, flicking jam around (it wasn't enough to liquefy it in the jar), and messing with the hot water supply while in the shower, no matter if there were very few other water users at that time of the morning.

And it would seem, with the sunrise light being particularly penetrating, more than it ever has been, that the perps needed me to be doing my regular web site browsing at this critical time of day. That is, critical for them and their nonconsensual research/abusive and invasive fuckery. I have never seen the sunrise having so many cycles of brightness and then fading out, at least four in the past 15 minutes, another never-before event. And I see that there was a light rain shower in the night, very possibly connected, though I don't claim to know exactly what it is, but base my speculation on the timing of past rain showers and their propensity to "happen" just before setting off driving.

The neighborhood tapping noise has started up as I am typing this; this is at least a 18 month long intermittent source, and yet there is no evident activity which supports these construction type of noises.

I am done all my regular web troving for the day, and still have most of it remaining for "do-squat", as in forced nothing time, though invariably some notion comes in from afar to spin the activities some more. There is a decided emphasis on having me wear earmuffs, aka hearing protection, and then have the perps slowly increment the noise in them; a ringing din, a distant voice on the radio like sound, and of course the transitory noises that somehow get through, and when I take the earmuffs off to block my ears the offending noise is quite faint. Funny how that keeps happening.

Other abusive shit is the fuckers invoking a metallic flavor in my mouth this morning, just a hint coming through every so often to remind me that any sensed input is at the behest of my mindkeepers. The degree of typo sabotage is getting intense, so time to refrain from baiting the assholes anymore.

The left upper eyelid spasms are back again, and it seems that it is mighty cuurious that is where other plasma bursts and pertubations have been coming from. And back in my college days in 1976 or so I had that same "problem" and saw a doctor for it who gave me my very first, and thankfully last, prescription for Valium to "break" the spasming. Little did I know he was conscripted for the cause to aid further invasive fuckery that still has its manifestations.

Tea and chocolate are done, and now it is time for the perps to play post-food intake games, the attraction being the process of digestion, and I would assume, the color changes that go with it. I am getting a three vehicle siren cascade, and I am sure that is part of it too, getting through my earmuffs. I also heard the jackhammer noise for the first time in four days immediately after lunch, so I will assume that it is part of the show too. And the forced sleepies as well now, driving me to stop blogging for now.

Here is an interesting article, If it is Hard to Say it Must be Risky. I notice that the perps pump me with spam from many nationalities and like to noisestalk me the instant I see a foreign name. They have also set me up to hear foreign names as well, it it might be for the reasons that are mentioned in the link. Foreign names, particularly if they cannot be readily translated to English will bring on a sense of distrust. And this normal and protective reaction might be the reason the assholes find it so interesting whenever I see or read foreign names.

I am being contained in a depressive blue funk this afternoon; a state the assholes like to keep me in at times. Though, oddly, they had me in an almost over happy mood at the end of the cleaning job last night. I instantly recognized the assholes had created a never-before mood state for that context, and then they immediately took me down a notch to be relatively neutral. Other TI's (Rachael O) are getting intensified feelings of despair, and it does make me wonder why the perps seem to be coordinating this.

An early dinner was just completed with plenty of provocations from the assholes; jabbing me underfoot, flicking water about, faked touches when I was at least 18" away from anything, crumb deposition games and others all to a selective background of outside noise. Girls screaming noises were scripted exactly at the moment the olive oil was poured into the frypan, in keeping with their obsession over this food item, and essential fatty acids in general. So now back to online putzing until 1730h when I head out for the cleaning job at the car dealership. After an extended session of being cooped up (since 0410h this morning), I am quite sure the gangstalking will be on the extreme side if past history is a guide. And of course this is the food digestion time, always a big deal for the assholes as well, likely because of gradual color changes to the food as it is digested. Much the same as the tea steeping being of such interest; a slow gradual change in color gets the perps very excited, whether it is in direct line of sight or inside my stomach.

And they are also adding more red tinting to this white LCD display, either across the entire 22" screen or on spots that linger on from the immediately preceding display. They are jangling me with plenty of red colors today, not unlike yesterday, and aren't concerned about massing them as much as they once were. Other increased color games have been with real objects, and it is mostly in the form of enhancing the edges of the dinner plates or other crockery with a band of yellow or violet. Regular readers will know that I have been given the reason for this as LSD emulation, stemming from the time, they say, that they dosed me when aged 2 to 5 years old, 1956 to 1959. Apparently, the traumatizations were captured in my subconscious recollection, something that they cannot yet totally fuck with. This comes from a very unreliable source, but they have been consistently doing this edge enhancement for at least five of the last seven years of this intesified harassment, so there might be some merit in their planted explanation. I don't know of other TI's who get this same visual perturbation that I do. And too, regular readers will recall from nearly two years ago when my in-town brother and I were packing my furniture across our parent's lawn, normally green, and the assholes made it all red colored. It was totally bizarre and my brother remarked on it. I was severely rattled by the experience, but I have no idea if it was the sickos governing my "reaction", or if it was a genuine response. That marks one of three major fuckups from the "lost years" that they have informed me of, again without any conscious recall.

Another major fuckup of theirs they tell me about was visiting the infamous Dr. Cameron in McGill in Montreal where we lived from 1956 to 1957. There is some recollection of those days, but some inexplicable disjunct periods of no recollection, not to mention a likely three day train ride back to Victoria here. And when looking at old photographs two weeks ago at my parent's place I saw a picture of me and my younger brother in a stroller taken in Montreal. That would mean that I was there in 1958-9, and I have absoluted no recollection of this second stay in Montreal. My younger brother was born in Victoria in 10-1957, so that meant there was more back and forthing to Montreal than I knew about. And with no recollection of him arriving, or even his care, and not even of him or a second trip to Montreal in 1958-59, it is mighty mysterious as to what the fuck went on and how did we get about, as it would of been by train, my father's preferred mode of travel until the 1970's.

The perps did enlighten me a few days ago when I was recalling, or more like them planting, 1956-57 recollections of being in Montreal, the first trip. I remember being out in the very deep snow outside the house, and then the next time I recalled exiting the front door it was all gone. It was a total surprise and there was no graduated appreciation of the snow melting. I have never had such disjunct recollections in my life since the purported memory fucking days until 1960 when I started school, so it remains rather mysterious these very fragmentary recollections were established and that they were disjunct, not to mention zero recall for the latter Montreal trip. Very curious all this, as well as the Scottish accents that are part of the Unfavored and the freakshow, as Dr. Cameron was Scottish. One of the Duplessis Orphans who I spoke to on the phone last year said that he was also a child abuser, something that has never made it into the many writings of his former patients. Another interesting tidbit, and I wouldn't know if this was a means to plant this as an elicitation of my subconscious recall, or if he was recounting that tale of woe in more detail. This is another angle the assholes tantalize me over, these fleeting snippets and emulations, especially the skinheaded males, and I really don't know why they stick with this theme to the degree that they do.

And the amount of clunking that is going on, and getting through my earmuffs, tells me that the assholes have a very strong interest in me recounting the above purported abuse, and the seeming recall deletions they may have performed. Certainly, my recall is unusually fragmented over that time frame and unlike anytime since.

More bookmarking tonight with the earmuffs on and the introduced crackling sound each time I bookmarked, read a name, displayed a photo of a musician, performed Windows select, copy and paste functions and manipulated text for the bookmark description. And to add to the fucking annoyances, the leg torquing and muscle twitching was imposed at the same junctures and often simultaneously with the earmuff noises.

Tonight it is Serena Ryder's concert keeping me company as I type. Not metal by a wide margin. The entire music interest of the perps has me intrigued for many reasons; not only the coincident arrangement with their noise stalking, but also the intense interest they have when I read their names or see a photo, but also the guitar stalking. In the latter case I had another troubador gangstalking (aka guitarstalking) act with the Fuckwit balancing his guitar over his shoulder by leaning on the neck with one hand. Totally absurd, and if anyone cared for their instrument they would never hold a guitar in that fashion. I just don't get it as to why they need to show me guitars all the time. Though in theory, it could also have something to do with the above mentioned "lost years".

And lo, if the headphones don't exhibit the same spontaneous clicking and clunking at the same junctures as the earmuffs mentioned above. And plenty more text distortion fuckery while reading online. First they wouldn't let me read much, and then after a break, they did, but added in perceptual vision fuckery such as having the web page text shift left or right a paragraph at a time, lift off the page seemingly and a host of never-before visual perturbances.

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