Monday, November 12, 2018

Harvest Party

 A Monday off work due to the national holiday yesterday, Rememberance Day. Though in fact, I did work yesterday on the construction site. Nice that there were so few trades around as I could get things done. My regular co-worker was with me for part of the day, but as we ran out of glue to finish the job, only part of it could get completed for the afternoon. Said co-worker is the one who threw a passive-aggressive hissy fit three weeks ago over a big nothing, another one of those "what was that about" experiences that have come on since all this abuse and harassment came down in 04-2002. Said co-worker is a little more friendly and talkative since then, and a two week work separation hiatus might of helped. The day after his ridiculous hissy fit he was re-assigned, hardly a coincidence, though I never told anyone anything and he said he wouldn't either. He has mellowed a little, and isn't so strange as he was before, since I began working with him in 09-2018. A Russian emigre, and true to form, cannot be figured out. Anyhow, we get a lot done together, and that suits each of us just fine as we are both accomplishment minded and like to do things efficiently.

And a hiatus from yoga again, due to today's holiday, and the perps just love to break up regular occurences, no matter the frequency; once per week to once per day etc. No good habit or regular practice goes undisrupted (or unsabotaged). Last week it was a Monday night show, so it will be three weeks since I get back to class unless I somehow join a class this week, a notion that curiously escapes me when these Monday night yoga disruptions come on.

The last class was a repeat of classes some six weeks ago, when the very dark skinned E. Indian arrives in class at the last minute and sits beside me at a spot that was left open. How this particular entrance timing and mat location selection "happens" so many times for this one particular individual cannot be a coincidence. Not only was a prime mat location left open for him while some 15 other yogis filed in beforehand in th preceding 15 minutes, but it the whole thing tells me that everyone else was arriving according to a schedule and in accordance to a seating plan. In seating himself beside me, this E. Indian  male also "happened" to place himself in front of the mirror reflection of this pretty blonde girl I had been checking out for the prior 15 minutes. So, instead of her gorgeous visage in the mirror, I get the fugly E. Indian male, a regular in terms of stalking next to to me. (Another case of bait and switch; babe, and then the fugly dude arrives later in her place). And again liek the last time, the poor fellow got too hot and had to remove his shirt for crissakes. I think they should ban this practice and have everyone keep their shirts on in yoga class. I suppose this whole deal is about exposing me to a whole lot of dark skin from 4' away, something I wouldn't ordinarily be exposed to for any length.

And the E. Indians continue to plague me at the construction site. Anytime I change a floor that I am working on, or re-assigned to a new task, they "happen" to arrive or else already be in place, jabbering away. I am down for three of these events this week, normally at least two more per week. In a stunt of high absurdity, they even parked themselves on ladders immediately outside the elevator doors that I was to exit from. The elevator operator had to ask them to pack it up. Again, more ladder games, this time from a high-prominence stalking ethnic subpopulation.

A good show at The Dream Cafe last week, and although I did not get any protracted staring from the performers, I got a lot of direct looks from one of the threesome. At one point he said, "I truly believe that good will prevail in this world..." and then shot a look at me, some 40' away against the back wall and in the dark. Like WTF: don't look at me for any kind of affirmation on that; all I know is sustained and relentless abuse as a mind controlled subject, and knowing my family was in on it from the get-go and are therefore are a bunch of sick-assed perfidious quislings who should be given the usual war time justice for such ilk.

My vineyard employer had a harvest party this Thursday; "no kids" said the invitational text, and lo, there were at least four of them parading by me with the usual (perp patented) "look-away" countenance. As to why I get kiddie-stalked all the time I have no idea, but I consider it the apogee of mental depravity, to send or bring one's children into stalk a lifetime victim of senseless and relentless abuse. For those parents who send their children on these missions, go fuck yourselves.

Said harvest party was about three hours and I met up with some old faces, my foreman, the owners (employers) and a few others. I met some new winemakers and industry folks, and enjoyed the company. An interesting looking woman I hadn't seen before was across the room, and eventually when she "happened" to look my direction from 15' away, she had this disparaging and nasty look. OK, I get it; you got my attention and then made sure I was roundly disappointed. I know this routine, and don't consider it too different than the occasions at the hair stylist school where I get my hair cut, when a personable and talkative stylist first cuts my hair. Some six weeks later on my return visit the same stylist won't even look at me, and makes a big point of been seen but not being in any way friendly. Same old thing; bait and change, usually for the worse.

And I get the sense that my perceptions of many of the stalking and stunts that so well known to me over these past 16.5 years of this berserk and overt abuse are getting remotely dithered by the perps. That is to say, my identification (or cognition) of the fraught and torturous reality that I have been kept in, (the stunts and incidents and their relationship to past patterns), and which is immediately recognizable and familiar to me, is now being cognitively interfered with. For example, the above mentioned kiddie stalking only "occurred" to me some hours after the event when normally I would of identified it right then and there. Which is to say, the perps have begun a new phase of deleting my knowledge of their abusive methods as they occur. Not a good sign, and likely has more ominous ramifications. Or put another way, the assholes won't allow me to identify their relentless and consitent stunts and supporting routines as they occur.

Anyhow, I should get this one posted for the week so I don't get backed up.

Sunday, November 04, 2018

Decision Making Stalking

Just what is it about making a decision that so interests these assholes who have been overtly hounding my ass for the last 16+ years? The same crew that runs and ruins my existence (not called a life any more), down to infinitesmal levels of detail, also needs to rag my butt whenever I make a decision. And of course, they like it too when I am forced to revoke a decision, modify it, or hit the wall and cannot make one in the face of an confluence of confliction eruption.

Nowhere is this more evident than when I go out in the stores and go shopping as I did today, a Sunday off. The stalkers arrive ahead of me at the store aisle location where I am interested in something, (and usually I cannot find it at first, delaying the decision making episode of course), then one stalker screws off and another one comes by, and if I feel I am getting too crushed by the procession and/or clusterfuck of these Fuckwits, I abandon the exercise and head out to the cashier. Another variation is to present unexpected alternatives, say (today), glass cleaning wipes instead of the glass cleaning spray foam that I was looking for, and then have me "decide" if the new-to-me alternative is better. (I bought both, never trusting new items that I "happen" to find). Another momentary decison reflection moment is when they jack with the price and I process this and then re-decide. This constant hounding of me today in the Cambodian Tire store (not its real name) is plain fucking insane. I rarely go to this larger hardware and home ware store as I get constantly skunked, (that is, don't find what I am looking for) and stalked too, but they do have automotive things that the alternative store doesn't have.

And why would some endlessly funded deep black (and relentlessly malevolent and psychopathic) organization hound my ass over when I make a decision? My father could never seem to make a decision, and in viewing and suffering from his traits when in his care, I resolved never to be such an ditz, and as far as I know, I am not when it comes to this activity. Which begs the larger question, just what are the perps after in this context? Could it be that a decison is a branch point in the Many Worlds Quantum Mechanics Interpretation (MWI -Gizmodo's version)  and that the assholes are attempting to determine this theoretical event in actuality and in real time? Add in the gangstalkers, whom may fulfil the role of "vibe cohorts", a la this quote from a neuroscientist;

"The more we study engagement, we see time and again that just being next to certain people actually aligns your brain with them..."

and maybe the perps are onto some kind of many worlds quantum detection methodology in real time. Not that I give a rat's ass about it, all I want to be is left the fuck alone. And not forgetting that this same crew does teleportation and telekinesis as a normal everyday practice in the course of delivering their abuse as I have come to know it. Not only are they very far ahead of human capabilities, (aided by supressing scientific research) but they have a research agenda beyond that even. One can research the Many Worlds Interpretation for hours online, but for me, it doesn't do much, as I just don't have the cognitive capability to take it all in and process it. It is interesting though that the perps had me "discover" Hugh Everett and his MWI a couple of years ago, something that I would not be ordinarily interested in.

Then added to the above is another litany of insane interest by the perps, which is the act of measuring something. Or, even estimating, guessitmating, and all variations of certainty that can occur in the process. This too has Many Worlds Interpretation implications, with the theoretical notion that the world, or one's perception of it, splits when one takes a measurement. Or, alternatively in the Copenhagen quantum mechanics interpretation, there is a wave function collapse, and the observer is part of the quantum system. Well I suppose, if one can somehow eliminate the observer's cognitive awareness at the time of measurement, just maybe something else can be discovered. Whatever, just leave me the fuck alone. I don't operate at these rareified levels of theoretic debate and have no interest in doing so. Again, one can go for weeks in chasing down all the theoretical ramifications of this, but leave me out of it.

And it is unlikely to be happenchance that the perps have me in a current job where I have made many measurements often over the past three months of this construction gig. (I am installing chair railing at major hospital construction site). And if they have been covertly following me all these years (as it seems) until they went berserk/overt on me in 04-2002, I have had plenty of prior measuring experience. I worked in forest inventory for many summers, and took tree measurements for diameter and heights often, for both one time samples (temporary plots) and also permanent sample plots where one returns to a site with number tagged trees and remeasures the same identical ones every 5 or 10 years or so. That is, differing crews in differing measurement field project initiatives return to gather this data for determining tree growth statistics so they may be grouped and extrapolated into growth functions to predict future forest growth, and thereby support forest harvesting decisions.

Another curiousity, likely related though I don't know how, is the perps' interest in me when percieving time. Today is when the daylight savings time is converted back to standard time, and the perps have demonstrated a long interest in that since they went into overt harassment mode. This year, my difficult-to-adjust Timex digital sports watch "somehow" got snagged and thereby changed a week ago to exactly one hour earlier, and thereby saving me the extreme hassle of attempting to change it myself. Even the watch repair guys had a tough time changing it in the spring owing to sticky or otherwise reluctant change buttons. And yes, I have the manual for the watch, but it defies the prescribed instructions. On at least half the occasions where I had to change the time on my watch, I had to take it in to a jeweller and have them change the time for me. An astonishing coincidence by any means, and with at least three digital watches in the last 16 years, all the more so. (Not counting the two analog watches that "failed", both with steel mesh bands, that "happened" when the assholes first mugged me with this psychopathic outrage in 04-2002). Add the perception of time to the above mentioned decision making and measuring interest the perps have and see if you can develop a coherent thesis on what they are after.

Yesterday, in an infuriating mind-fuck bout of decision over-ride, I went grape harvesting with my fickle friend at his boss' site. I hadn't been in a vineyard since mid-August when I my employment was terminated as they had no further work. Going by last year, my former employer would of phoned me up at least three times and asked for some spot help for grape harvesting. Yesterday, it ended up that the rain came on about 1100h, and we picked until 1700h as there was a transfer truck with a fork lift waiting for all the harvested grapes. Normally they shut down harvest operations when it rains, but not this time. Which of course, meant that I wasn't fully prepared for picking in the rain as they always shut the harvest down, and I expected that they would this time too. But the end of it, I was cold and wet, a situation that I always am prepared for by bringing extra clothing, but "somehow" I got faked out this time. Well done assholes.

I had wanted to take yesterday, a Saturday, off to to go to the walk-in doctor clinic and get my four Rx renewed. It was my plan, or decision if you will, to do so for at least the prior 6 days, and when my fickle friend phoned Friday night to ask if I was available for picking the next day, I immediately said "yes". As to why, I have no idea, as I had other plans for my Saturday. These kind of mindless cannot-say-no "decisions" have been "happening" more of late, and I am getting increasingly pissed off at this owing to the downstream inconveniences.

And of course, interuptions in my Rx intake have been long part of the perp's games, and having them run out, even for a day or two, suits their agenda perfectly. It just pisses me off intensely that I cannot be allowed to consistently apply a remedy to fix, or attend, to a medical problem that they brought on in the first place. Or in the least, a problem that they are managing. Just more grist for the nonconsensual research agenda, these Rx intake variations, as they would see it. And too, it would be in keeping with another of their long standing sabotage objectives that "no good deed go unpunished", or alternatively, that "no effective habit/remedy go unsabotaged", a theme that has come up in many prior postings.

Enough said for now, and onto posting this.