Same Title as Last Posting

11-18-2019
Just when I want to put this together, why, another MS Windows upgrade and lo, if I didn't get some 30 crashes over the day.

[In fact, this should be titled System Crash #2 of 2019, as I suffered another three week outage for repairs following this write up, but before it got published].

And too, I have been roundly emotionally pummeled, with subsequent evening recovery time, by this male co-worker who is the most unpleasant and denigrative person I have ever encountered on a job. Not only is he uncommunicative and affrontive, he doesn't explain what he is intending to do, thereby exacerbating the already tense situation. Add in some dissonant diversions like, "we must work together", and then he doesn't (never did; totally out of character), and even more specific task dissonance such as, "we must cut (trellis) wires together", when he hadn't, and then continues to ignore his own directive. And if I am momentarily waiting for him to be available to cut the wires together, he gives me shit. A damned if you do, and damned if you don't kind of guy, along with being insulting. Add in the unsafe practice of him cutting the high tensile steel trellis wires by himself and letting the end go, which is very springy, and so it comes flying some 60' back at me. (Dangerous as the wire tip can cut one, or take out one's eye if not wearing goggles, though I do.)

Anyhow, when one views going to work with trepidation and angst, it isn't a good gig. Add in my (likely exploited) ADD nature of not getting instructions right the first time, along with his minimal or no direction as to what to do, its a scene where someone figuratively lit the accelerant in terms of interaction. Or, in the perp oversight context, have the victim be bullied and verbally cut down, constantly.

And what might be the reason for this? Why, it is a momentary way (at least) to deplete the victim's dopamine. And furthermore, should one be bullied and emotionally abused during one's developmental years, it leads to permanent brain changes, and not for the better (per JAMA paper, here). And so it comes to pass, that yet another social problem that is widespread and increasing all too much if the whole media show is to be believed, that is, bullying, has a dopamine depletion component. And it just might be purposely applied to the population at large for this same reason.

Not too put too fine a point on it, but also, societal crippling with opiods and like addictive substances, delivered in great quantity the by the CIA, (e.g. Mena) etc. also cause release of dopamine. This runs down one's own natural dopamine feedback and generative capabilities, leaving one dependent on an exogenous supply, aka, addicted. Another world wide, and an significantly unfortunate one at that, dopamine depletion study on the population at large IMHO.

Just speculating of course, but with yours truly a dopamine deficient ADD sufferer, and a TI since 04-2002 after a lifetime of being covertly monitored, surveilled and remotely controlled to some extent, this whole human experience of dopamine reduction, depletion, and other imposed jacking around with such a vital animal hormone, (and it is, not just a neurotransmitter), this whole world wide dopamine study theory seems to tie together.

While TI''s are in the hot seat as study subjects, and kept acutely aware of their plight while always being under their (TPTB) thumb, some or much of the rest of the population may well be at least monitored in some capacity with respect to their dopamine, genetic and bioenergetic interactions. And too, with the relentless media promotion of "love", (a neurochemical surge of dopamine), this state too could be another worldwide dopamine study coming from the opposite direction. Well at least, it may answer the long running question all TI's have, "why did they decide to pick on me?".

Though in fact, the answer is likely to be many faceted. One's endogenous dopamine state is one selection criteria (aka, nonconsensual research parameter), but I suspect that blood type and lineage is another, one's energetic profile, skin color and the melatonin and dopamine interaction, one's knowledge comprehension and retention capabilities, and a few others. I don't buy into the organization retribution angle much; likely they (the covert researchers) had the victim/subject lined up since birth (as it seems in my case) and then staged a workplace stunt, say, to then cause an event (say, whistleblowing) that paints a picture of the organization invoking a nefarious retribution targeting of the individual. Sure, perhaps a few may suffer this fate, but should this "happen" to you, I would re-examine one's whole life and the interesting coincidences, aberrant behavior of others and other high strangeness to see if there was a pattern all the while. I cannot think of anything more humbling and perturbing to learn that one's life was an orchestrated fraud all along, and all one's family and friends are nothing more than treasonous quislings on the stage.

Anyhow, now 12-11-2019, and I will get this posted and call this much delayed missive done.